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  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Artwork by Bjorn Lie

    Includes unlimited streaming of Accidents and Pretty Girls (or How Not To Woo A Woman) via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
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Inspired by The Horologicon, by Mark Forsyth.


I wake in the morning just before dawn
Uhtceare my dreamery’s gone
Thinking there’s so much to do and no time
Day-peep comes but the sun doesn’t shine
Cunctuation I can’t face the day
Pissaprest, hope it goes away
The rum-peeper shows me my pimginnits
I’m trying fucation to cover my zits
I can’t be bothered to straighten my hair
I’m cymotrichous and I don’t care
Most of my clothes are second hand
I’m a ragabash cos I’m in a band
I’m in need of ariston and a butter-shag
My cackling farts are over done
My toast is brizzled and Brizzle’s my home
It’s time to leave it with my cello
And more, to oxter lift and go
It’s the day of the gig at the bookshop
The band must charette and write till we drop
It’s a panic party but a jolly one
As long as we Chado to help us with songs
Ben is our host and makes pots of tea
We’re about to be golopshusly
bedinnered you’ll see
His cackling farts are just spot on
There’s cheesy toast within this home
Now it’s time to leave it with our big load
And more, to oxter lift and go
Waiting for people to turn up and sit
Nervously practising this little bit
Fisking around the bookshop and then
The author and audience, ladies and men
Now we’re at the song’s eschaton
Soon to be quafftide for this little one.
Nod-crafty people say they listened hard
Now to be vinolent, hand me a glass.
My fackling carts are over done
My head is Brizzled or is that my home?
It’s time to leave with David’s sow
And more to oxter lift and go.


from Accidents and Pretty Girls (or How Not To Woo A Woman), released February 14, 2017
Beth Porter - vocals, ukulele, cello. Ben Please - vocals, glockenspiel. Poppy Pitt - vocals. Mark Forsyth - harmonica, vocals. Emma Hooper - viola. Sue Lord - violin. Ian Vorley - violin. Pete Judge - tenor horn, flugal, tuba, trumpet. James Watts - oboe. Jools Scott - piano, vocals. Choir - Emma Hooper, Charlie Williams, Sue Lord, Nina Marie, Caroline Waterlow, Owen Benson, Mark Forsyth.


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The Bookshop Band Bath, UK

The Bookshop Band write songs inspired by books and play them in bookshops. They started as a collaboration between a group of musicians in Bath and their local independent bookshop, Mr B's Emporium. Now they are about to go on tour, sponsored by Vintage Books and Independent Booksellers Week, around other bookshops and lit fests. Catch them if you can. Details at www.thebookshopband.co.uk ... more

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